A huge downer in our life

was trying not to focus on it but it's really hard for me not to feel down with the recent events. it's already tiring to view units one after another and with the prices really gone high, we don't seem to have much of a choice. blame it on our 10 yrs of stay in singapore and got used to staying in much better places. now, though it's suppose to be not much big of a deal, i think it's becoming a downer for us. after a lot of viewing taking our strength and time with cheskapot, we cant seem to find the right place that suits our needs. maybe we'll get used to it :(  all i really wish is to have a place of our own in a place we called home for 10 years. and wishing that it's not that high to rent your own place so we can live a normal life without stress. wish lang naman :( hayyyzzzz

The Wine Company and about Friendship

Just came home from our lovely fabulous dinner at Dempsey Hill. I didn’t know this place exist in Singapore lol. The place is really cozy with very affordable wines! This place is a heaven for wine lovers and for the not so into wines, it still should go to their must see places. The place was recommended by the two girls. I had a really fun night tonight. Serious talks, girl talk hihihi over a yummy ribs and sausage platter and pizza with a bottle of Reisling, feeling Carrie of SATC ang beauty ko! Thank you girls! I’m so glad I still have few left pa pala.

Over a fun dinner, of course, I couldn’t help with a few realization about friendship. A) that not all the people you know and listed as friends are genuinely happy with what you have in life. they find it annoying to see something new happening in your life. or they seem to be happy but eventually you’ll find in another way that they weren’t. honestly, i don’t get it. BUT if they’re happy always finding something off with you, just let it be. B) that i wanted to do things just to “cleanse” off the negative air around me but I just don’t know how. C) that FB helped me to find out that i have millions of friends and it also helped me realized that only 100 of them are genuine or sincere. SO, i’m about to start with my downsizing BUT then again, I don’t want to put a flammable liquid into the already burning fire SO I might take time to let few remain for the reason that I alone can only understand.

Ok so above all the items i listed, one thing’s for sure. i’d rather keep 1 or 2 of my most priced possessions than keeping all with the rustic vibes else i might end up with nothing at all. thank you for your post for making me realize the above things. in all honesty, i was a bit affected at first, but now, i’m feeling a little happy about it. why fret over a rustic nail when it won’t ever helped you get hold of that beautiful painting you have? i still have my un’amica stretta and i’ll be glad to spend my time on them :) I don’t want to be remembered as the one causing so much annoyance in someone else’s life so i’d rather stay away so I won’t cause them stress. i’m sorry if i bother you with some information about my life. i’ll try to be boring next time.

My First LV

Another blessing indeed and a dream come true

I always thank God for letting me reach some of my “impossible” dreams. Though I admit, they seem to be shallow, but still, it is something that I’m really thankful for. I just want to blog this day that I finally got another blessing. Of course, I wouldn’t let it pass without blogging the details. but at the moment, let this suffice.

Thank you dadi for always “spoiling” me in everything as long as you can. Thank you for the birthday / wedding anniversary / christmas / bf-gf anniversary / valentines gift.  I’m not one to complain. I got what I really really wanted. Been drooling on it for years and now it’s here. So, thank you, thank you, thank you!

I love you dadi! Even without the material things you’re giving me. I will always do. Because through you, I have known your family. Through you, I’ve gone so far and achieved so many things in life. Through you, I’ve been strong whenever I wanted to give up and when my life was filled with so much drama. And through you, I have my little miss busangot, who never fail to make my heart flutter each minute of the day.

Uberly happy!

Don’t you sometimes wish???

To be extremely rich so you’ll be able to buy those pretty little things with exorbitant price tags around their neck? I do. It’s selfish. It’s worldly sinful. But I admit my shallowness shows whenever I see these lovely pieces. Sigh. Well, like they always say “libre lang mangarap”. Whatever it is. You’ll never know :)

Some women adores shoes and collects numbers of them. They get extremely high whenever they visited shoe stores. I am not one of them. Because my heart belongs to bags :D Here’s a few pieces I really love and made my heart flutter each weekend we paid a visit to these shops along Orchard. And I swear I’m loving my husband for giving in to my vices sometimes. It’s my happiness at the end of the long stressful week :) Bags, bags, bags, I can’t seem to get enough of them… Wish, wish, wish, wish I’m rich as any celebrity in hollywood.

Some people may find it hard to believe that there are people buying these kind of bags. I guess it’s an obsession. And everyone does have it, isn’t it? Owning a designer bag is an investment for some. You can resell them at a price almost the same amount. I’ve bought my very first designer bag in 2004 and for six years it has served me well. When I last visited gucci, the bag was still there and selling a hundred dollars more. So you see, it’s not just all a waste of money :D And I know a lot of second hand shops that are selling bags that you can’t imagine you’ll be owning for the half price. There’s also an online store that let the people rent a bag for a week at $50 or less :) Ok, so let’s have a peek at these lovely things.

Louis Vuitton – it’s the “IT” bag and almost everyone I know owns a piece from this famous brand. Or some like me still dreaming of owning one *lol*. The first two bags were my first love. It was on my wish list for 2009. Will it be Speedy or Neverfull?

Balenciaga – when I saw it last July at Glorietta 5 with the same color as below, I swear my heart skipped a beat. It’s like seeing Vin Diesel in person! too bad, wasn’t able to go inside the shop to feel them.

Chanel – this 2.55 bag is like part of my memories with SATC when Charlotte was carrying the white one.

Hermes – this Birkin bag is like a symbol of ultimate luxury. Like Chanel, it was also a part of my memories with SATC when Samantha was trying to red bag and uses Lucy Liu’s name just to skip the waiting list. And again was shown in second part of the movie where it made a lot of women gasp when it was broken. And I know, most of the fashionista’s already know what Lady Gaga had done to her Birkin. It’s her bag but still, it’s like, sigh. I don’t know how and why Hermes approved this kind of “inappropriate” behaviour. Sorry Lady Gaga. I do like you a bit but I think you’ve overdone it this time.

     

Christian Louboutin – still SATC. They should be thankful to Bushnell and the directors for introducing their lines to the “common” people. Now, even I know big names like Chanel, Hermes, Christian Louboutin, Jimmy Choo and Manolo Blahniks. CL’s red soles are their trademarks and I saw one pair of shoes in Takashimaya selling at SGD $1250. 

Manolo Blahnik – love the color and the feather!


Jimmy Choo – i will have this! because i saw one from Charles and Keith! lol!


Done reading? Take a deep breath and continue dreaming :) You’ll never know when Santa’s just around the corner :D

Blind - Lifehouse

I was young but I wasn't naive
I watched helpless as he turned around to leave
and still I have the pain I have to carry
a past so deep that even you could not bury if you tried

after all this time
I never thought we'd be here
never thought we'd be here
when my love for you was blind
but I couldn't make you see it
couldn't make you see it
that I loved you more than you'll ever know
a part of me died when I let you go

I would fall asleep
only in hopes of dreaming
that everything would be like is was before
but nights like this it seems are slowly fleeting
they disappear as reality is crashing to the floor

after all this time
I never thought we'd be here
never thought we'd be here
when my love for you was blind
but I couldn't make you see it
couldn't make you see it
that I loved you more than you'll ever know
a part of me died when I let you go

after all this time
would you ever wanna leave it
maybe you could not believe it
that my love for you was blind
but I couldn't make you see it
couldn't make you see it
that I loved you more than you will ever know
a part of me died when I let you go
and I loved you more than you'll ever know
a part of me dies when I let you go

Wild Wild Wet

Last week, the benipayo's invited us for a Saturday weekend at wild wild wet. Although we were already booked for 5pm for w@w sg EB, we decided to go with them since I have never set foot on that place ever and was bugging dadi to go ever since. I was too excited that I already prepared Cheska's things Thursday evening. It is a first time for the abdon's thus explains the eagerness.

So, last Saturday morning even at an hour and a half late, we still made it. At first I find it a bit expensive for $15 fee but when I saw the place, it was all worth it. Team B (Benipayo team lol) were on time and Alexi is already swimming when we got there. Team A (Abdon hihi) had lunch first then they all went for swim as I'm still on support. It is a bummer but no choice and I wont let it ruin my weekend with my family and friends. At 1:30 I was done supporting and bebe's already asleep so we started with the fun while ate bheng stays with bebe. *I made her go while doing the support so it’s my turn hihihi*

First stop - TSUNAMI: a big pool with waves as if you’re in a sea. And water do taste salty. The salbabidas are free to use of different sizes. I can't seem to get enough of the happiness on mamu's face. She's like a kid lol. So am I. It was so fun!

Second stop - SHIOK RIVER: a long narrow size pool with water flowing like a river. It is really relaxing. Though I must say that I never relax with much excitement on wanting to try everyULAR-LAH rides and attractions and hoping *just now* that bebe would sleep a bit longer hehehe.

Third stop - ULAR-LAH: the closest thing to experience white-water rafting daw and indeed. saya saya!

We went back to our place for a while and found bebe already awake. It was ok as i have enjoyed much of the rides anyway. And I was hoping to have a swim with her. We went to the PROFESSOR’s PLAYGROUND and this is really a good fun for kids of all ages. We tried WATERWORKS with open tube while mamu and ate bheng and bebe were waiting for us at the pool. Ahihihi kakatuwa. Surprisingly, the water isn’t that cold. Longest time I’ve been in water I think lol.

Mamu and ate bheng went back with bebe to finish off. We still went for another last hirit. We went to try SLIDE UP. Waaaaa roller coaster feeling - plunging down a really high ramp accelerating really fast. Kalurky! Parang naiwan puso ko sa ere. Still had a feeling of vertigo after that nerve wracking ride. But I’m proud of myself lol. I’ve always been a coward and to try that kind of ride is really something. But if you ask me again to try it, no way jose. Once is exciting and fun, twice is too much for me to bear as if hugging my own death sentence lol. Ok I’m really exaggerating now. Next ride for us is the SKYRIDER. Imagine monorail on a twin bike. Feeling mary poppin ako hihi. umbrella na lang kulang. But don’t judge it for the way it looks. At first, it might have an impression that it’s boring and really easy. For people who have terrible fear of heights, better stay in the water. Got scared as if we’ll fall down and as if some of those mechanical things will fall off. If this is suppose to be a relaxing ride, they fail to meet my standards lol.  Ok last na, haba na ng post ko. Last ride was the WATERWOKS with close tube. Naman! Uber sa dilim! Can’t see a thing or a single hint of light. Scary but fun hihihi.

That’s about our experience in WWW. It’s a really fun experience for family especially to those who haven’t tried it. We will go back there definitely. All you need to bring are your changing clothes, towel and most important is money. No need to bring food as there’s a lot of choices around. I super like this weekend! Thanks Ninong Dennis / Ninang Che for inviting us. Parang disneyland feeling! And another good thing is, it somehow helped in healing bebe’s rashes. Kelangan pala ihian ang tubig :D

Here’s the wild wild wet link for more info :) Not a promoter or employed by this company. I’m just one very satisfied customer :D

Wondering

At the end of each day, have you ever wonder if, by your actions or joke or words, someone got really hurt or cried? It maybe funny to you but there are some who don't. It's either they are really sensitive or you are insensitive. People like you who knows how to ruin a good day with just a snap of a finger should be pondering on such things.

I so wanted to be out but too scared to take the first step. *sob*

Grrr to the max level

I was suppose to be on call last sunday in case of issues. Since I didnt receive any call, figures I wasn't needed. When I got to office this morning pagsabihan ba ako na dapat tumawag ako to check kung may issue or wala? Eh di ba dapat pag may issue you dont send mail or sms na d naman mababasa? You were suppose to call first then send msg? Ako pa talaga sisihin? Grrr! Halatang halata favoritism. Pulitika talaga. May malipatan lang sana ako. Kakapikon na! Tumaas lang position tumaas na din ere ng hitad. Maging kuto ka lang titirisin kita ng pinong pino!

Apologize for the rant and bad behaviour. Hayyyz!

The long awaited reply from CebuPac

Remember my post 5 months ago with my complaint to cebupac? Well, after 5 long months, they did reply. And I don’t know whether to be happy or grateful with their reply. Sigh!

 

This July, we “have to” take Cebupac again from Manila-Sg. We have to be on the same flight with Ate Bheng as Dadi won’t be coming back with us yet. Sana naman!

Lucky Kids

Few weeks ago, I post a photo of a bottle of shampoo for kids with the disney character on it. I was thinking how lucky kids are nowadays. And just now, saw a family with a baby of about 2 or 3 years, with the netbook in front of her, to entertain her im sure. My inaanak alexi is always entertained when her parents gave her a phone where she can watched elmo or anything. They sure are one lucky generation. I still remember my cousins having the play gun made of wood and rattles made of plastic which Im sure my parents or any parents in that time wouldn't bother checking if it's made in China. I'm sure when the time comes that cheskapot could understand, she'll be annoyed with my sentences like "you're so lucky! back in my days, blah blah". Well to be honest, I am starting now with all her stuffed toys and fisher price toys and branded clothes that are really way too expensive. Lol! I'm not the one buying it. I'm the "nudger" so I still have the right to complain. Good thing the financier is not reading my blog :D

Cocoon

There were phases in our life where we  sometimes felt the feeling of loneliness and emptiness and envy and unappreciated all at the same time for no apparent reason. Or maybe there is. It's just too embarassingly painful to admit - even to yourself. I have had enough moments like this and when I do, I take a step back and retreat in my own cocoon. This helps me think and wallow in my own selfish thoughts - or not. Whatever.   

Nights in Rodanthe

I read the book and found it to be really dragging. I love NS and I've read most of his books. I just found this one really boring. I mean I did cry for some parts but most of the time I was really looking forward to finish the book just bec I was hoping the ending is good. But it's not. It's the first time I got disappointed with a book. No offense to NS and especially to the readers who really loved the book. Im a huge NS fan but this particular story I'd really wanted to forget. I bought a DVD on sale hoping the movie will put justice to it. But it didn't. There were a lot of good things from the book that was omitted. A widows love for her late husband, a daughters love for her father and the love of a man for her late wife. Those parts were so good. In fact, I think the only good thing in the book. Inspite of this terrible particular book, I will still complete my NS collection and read and watch the movie adaptations. Hoping this is the only rotten tomato among the bunch.

Sentiments

there was a time in my life that i felt the joy and pain of being a parent to my siblings. more of like the "father" since i was there with them financially and not at times they really needed someone. i couldn't even say that i've been a sister to them since i never really knew them for that long. and i couldn't say that im proud of any of it. i was just trying to play the part that God asked me to. i don't even feel like i have the "authority" to tell them what's good and what's not for their life. but sometimes when they did a decision in their life, i had this feeling that i thought they owe me something - at least shaping their life into what you think is best for them. and when it's going the other way around, i felt cheated or moreso HURT. i guess, i have to accept the fact that what i thought would make them happy isn't really making them happy. they have their own life to live just as i had mine. im just praying hardly to God to be with them and guide them every step of the way just as He did to me. I'm not saying my life is perfect now. but i somehow had that notion that i passed what was expected of me. if it's hard for me, it must be million times for my mom. i wish cheska will go easy on me when she grows up.

Trip to ICA

This morning’s attempt to re-appeal baby Cheska’s PR application wasn’t what you called fruitful. I thought we will be talking to someone to reasoned out Cheska’s rejected application. It still is better to get rejected knowing the grounds than receiving a plain letter with only “Sorry, you application has been denied”. Anyway, we submitted the re-appeal form with the re-appeal letter we made and then we proceed to 4th floor where we applied for her extension. She got extended alright but only until end of May. Re-appeal takes another 6 months processing. Now, we were advised to apply for a long term pass for her. OMG! This is really really troublesome. I still can’t accept the fact that they can reject a PR application of a baby. Way to go Singapore! I love Singapore. Woooo-hooo! Hooooray!

Sad

We got the letter from ICA regarding bebe’s PR application. It was applied last October and we were just at the ICA last January which they said it was impossible for a baby to get denied especially if both parents are PR. But how come in the letter it reads “we regret to inform you that your application was unsuccessful”. I hope tomorrow when I call ICA, it’ll be something like “Sorry there was just a mistake. Your baby’s application is successful” But to be honest, THIS will be a big change in all of our lives. Sorry, can’t help it but be really sad and think of the could-have-been’s.

 

I wanted to cry but I know dadi b will only tell me there’s nothing to cry. But I really really felt sad. :(

Au Revoir, Toffee

Heard the news from sister K that our first baby Toffee was gone. I haven’t talked to her and she hasn’t replied to my sms yet as to what was the cause of Toffee’s demise. I know, if anyone will be devastated, it will be bunso. Toffee’s her real baby :( Goodbye, Toffee. If there’s a thing called dog-heaven, I’m sure that’s where you’ll be going :( Good riddance to the sweetest, smelliest and playful dog I’ve ever known. Say hello to Marley for us.

 

A sad sad day for everyone

today is the 2nd day. many of us still can't believe she's gone. many of us wanted to believe that it never happen, that she's now home taking care of baby coby.  close or not, it's a big shock just to know she's gone at the age of 27 or 28. to know how she never even got to half of a full life in this world. i don't know which one makes my heart ache - the things I've said about her or because i cant imagine the pain of the family she left behind especially our good friend bogs. now, i guess it would take years before we see the smile on his face, the excitement and happiness whenever he tells us his plans about his baby and wife. it's all sudden. I'm not related to any of them. i don't even know E's maiden name at first. i don't even know E that much. having said that i wonder why did i cried so much the moment i heard the news and why do i still feel lump in my throat and get teary eyed every time i remember E’s gone now and knowing how my friend bogs is taking it. it’s just so sad :( really really sad.

why do extreme pain like this happen to good people? wait no, i guess i don’t want to hear any other answer to that question. because honestly, the answer that I'm looking for and the only answer that i wanted to hear is this –> “wait, I'm sorry. this kind of pain shouldn't happen. you don’t deserve it. let’s click a bit of rewind.” and then voila, everything is back to how it should be. no pain. i don’t like pain in any form as much as i hate heartaches. i don’t like the words “everything happens for a reason” or “it will make you strong” because let me tell you this, i don’t think making someone so weak by hitting them so hard in their chest makes them stronger. and wait, stronger for what? another heartache? and what could be that most wonderful reason that this thing has to happen? i’m not being cynical or anything. i guess, this is the only thing in life that i really really don’t understand. my faith is still intact, don’t worry. i just can’t seem to see the clarity of the reason why this has to happened. :(

Bogs, i don’t have the best of sympathy words to say. i don’t know how much pain you felt right now. let your heart cry out. let it bleed. let it feel the pain. let it numb. eventually, somehow, somewhere, it will heal. it might take you forever but you’ll find the intensity of it all gradually diminishing. keep the love and your memories with E alive. be sad when you feel the stab again. you’ll feel happiness again because you deserver it. and we are all praying for it. may God give you much strength to endure this. you have so many friends grieving with you and praying for you. i hope you’ll make it through. GOD BLESS.

E, we may have not shared a moment together but I feel like i know so much about you because of bogs. if you’re still here, i would tell you how much he loves you. he doesn’t say it to us, but i know he does. he talk so much about you. how you love to buy clothes and hang them in your closet which after few days, tags are still intact. how you love small cute little things. how he go out of his way to buy the 10 bucks worth of box with cutesy girly stuff in it just because he knows you like it. how he was so happy when you found out your pregnant. and the worried look on his face each time he tells us about some minor implications on your pregnancy. how he can’t stop telling us his plan of bringing you and baby back here in singapore. take care of bogs and baby while you’re away. i know you will guide them forever. you’re a great loss in this world. your smile and pretty face will never be forgotten. we’ll miss you terribly.

Passport to Freedom

I have been complaining *a lot* lately and I know it’s not proper to think that I’m still lucky I have one. But it’s really really tiring and giving me a lot of stress. I know they always say “be careful for what you wish for” and I’m really trying to be careful. I’ve been trying so hard not to give up. But it’s like I’ll burst one day. And before that happens, I so wanted to have something to look forward to before I leave that part of my world where proper sleep is really rare and family time isn’t included in the dictionary. I have taken that tiny step, of updating my passport to freedom. Hopefully, I’ll have the time especially the courage to try it one more time. I couldn’t say that this is my comfort zone because believe me it’s really far from that. I guess I’m staying because I have to. I’m not really complaining about the work and you know what it is if it’s not the work. I hope God is with me on this one. I have plan B but to put this into action will rock not just my world but also those around me. And this is that kind of plan that I’ll only do as a last resort.

On Books

From time to time, my obsession with collecting books, not just reading them, came running through my mind, making me spent endless hours in the bookstores or visit websites of my favourite authors or visit sites such as this one. I did listed some of them so I’ll know next which one to buy and which one to ditch – well, after reading the no of books I have in line which I have bought from last month’s book sale.

Source: Good Reads

Books that everyone should read at least once

I took out from the list in the website the books that least interests me. In yellow are the books I already owned and read sometime back. Remaining would be on my list of books to have.

To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee 
Anne Frank: The Diary of a Young Girl by Anne Frank
Nineteen Eighty-Four by George Orwell
Animal Farm by George Orwell
The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger 

Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury
Green Eggs and Ham by Dr. Seuss
Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone by J.K. Rowling
Jane Eyre by Charlotte Brontë
Alice's Adventures in Wonderland / Through the ... by Lewis Carroll
The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain
The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini
Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë
The Cat in the Hat by Dr. Seuss
Catch-22 by Joseph Heller
Twilight by Stephenie Meyer
Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom 

The Time Traveler's Wife by Audrey Niffenegger 
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban by J.K. Rowling
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows by J.K. Rowling
Memoirs of a Geisha by Arthur Golden 

The Old Man and the Sea by Ernest Hemingway
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire by J.K. Rowling
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince by J.K. Rowling
A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix by J.K. Rowling
The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho 
The Da Vinci Code by Dan Brown
The Five People You Meet in Heaven by Mitch Albom
The Notebook by Nicholas Sparks 

Matilda by Roald Dahl
Love in the Time of Cholera by Gabriel García Márquez
The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time by Mark Haddon
Eclipse by Stephenie Meyer
The Golden Compass by Philip Pullman 

Atonement by Ian McEwan
Breaking Dawn by Stephenie Meyer
New Moon by Stephenie Meyer 

The Diving Bell and the Butterfly by Jean-Dominique Bauby
James and the Giant Peach by Roald Dahl
Into the Wild by Jon Krakauer
A Farewell to Arms by Ernest Hemingway 

The Story of My Life by Helen Keller
Who Moved My Cheese? by Spencer Johnson 

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory by Roald Dahl
Horton Hears a Who! by Dr. Seuss
The Essential Calvin and Hobbes by Bill Watterson
The Amber Spyglass by Philip Pullman 

Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman 
The Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren
Down and Out in Paris and London by George Orwell
Inkheart by Cornelia Funke 

The Memory Keeper's Daughter by Kim Edwards
My Sister's Keeper by Jodi Picoult 

Dreams from My Father by Barack Obama
Alice in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll
How the Grinch Stole Christmas! by Dr. Seuss
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets by J.K. Rowling
Sam's Letters to Jennifer by James Patterson
Veronika Decides to Die by Paulo Coelho 
Left Behind by Tim LaHaye
The Tipping Point by Malcolm Gladwell
His Dark Materials Trilogy by Philip Pullman
American Gods by Neil Gaiman