Remind me again

That mixing up a number of glasses of beer in an empty stomach mixed with sex on the beach – that’s a cocktail you pervert :D – is a big NO for me the next time I’ll face the same chance again.

Life Changing Event for Tokyo

According to news, this is the worst earthquake ever recorded. May God bless the people of Tokyo. May God bless us all and this world that we live in.

source: Yahoo news

Hundreds killed in tsunami after 8.9 Japan quake

TOKYO – A ferocious tsunami spawned by one of the largest earthquakes on record slammed Japan's eastern coast Friday, killing hundreds of people as it swept away ships, cars and homes while widespread fires burned out of control.

Hours later, the tsunami hit Hawaii but did not cause major damage. Warnings blanketed the Pacific, putting areas on alert as far away as South America, Canada, Alaska and the entire U.S. West coast. In northeastern Japan, the area around a nuclear power plant was evacuated after the reactor's cooling system failed.

Police said 200 to 300 bodies were found in the northeastern coastal city of Sendai, the city in Miyagi prefecture, or state, closest to the epicenter. Another 137 were confirmed killed, with 531 people missing. Police also said 627 people were injured.

The magnitude-8.9 offshore quake unleashed a 23-foot (seven-meter) tsunami and was followed for hours by more than 50 aftershocks, many of them of more than magnitude 6.0.

Dozens of cities and villages along a 1,300-mile (2,100-kilometer) stretch of coastline were shaken by violent tremors that reached as far away as Tokyo, hundreds of miles (kilometers) from the epicenter. A large section of Kesennuma, a town of 70,000 people in Miyagi, burned furiously into the night with no apparent hope of being extinguished, public broadcaster NHK said.

"The earthquake has caused major damage in broad areas in northern Japan," Prime Minister Naoto Kan said at a news conference.

The quake was nearly 8,000 times stronger than one that struck New Zealand late last month, devastating the city of Christchurch.

"The energy radiated by this quake is nearly equal to one month's worth of energy consumption" in the United States, U.S. Geological Survey Scientist Brian Atwater told The Associated Press.

Click image to see photos of quake, tsunami damage

Reuters/Kyodo

The government ordered thousands of residents near a nuclear power plant in the city of Onahama to move back at least two miles (three kilometers) from the plant. The reactor was not leaking radiation but its core remained hot even after a shutdown. The plant is 170 miles (270 kilometers) northeast of Tokyo.

Trouble was reported at two other nuclear plants as well, but there was no radiation leak at either of them.

Japan's coast guard said it was searching for 80 dock workers on a ship that was swept away from a shipyard in Miyagi.

Even for a country used to earthquakes, this one was of horrific proportions because of the tsunami that crashed ashore, swallowing everything in its path as it surged several miles (kilometers) inland before retreating. The apocalyptic images on Japanese TV of powerful, debris-filled waves, uncontrolled fires and a ship caught in a massive whirlpool resembled scenes from a Hollywood disaster movie.

Large fishing boats and other vessels rode high waves ashore, slamming against overpasses or scraping under them and snapping power lines along the way. Upturned and partially submerged cars bobbed in the water. Ships anchored in ports crashed against each other.

The tsunami roared over embankments, washing anything in its path inland before reversing directions and carrying the cars, homes and other debris out to sea. Flames shot from some of the homes, probably because of burst gas pipes.

Waves of muddy waters flowed over farmland near Sendai, carrying buildings, some of them ablaze. Drivers attempted to flee. Sendai airport was inundated with thick, muddy debris that included cars, trucks, buses and even light planes.

Highways to the worst-hit coastal areas buckled. Telephone lines snapped. Train service in northeastern Japan and in Tokyo, which normally serve 10 million people a day, were suspended, leaving untold numbers stranded in stations or roaming the streets. Tokyo's Narita airport was closed indefinitely.

President Barack Obama said the U.S. "stands ready to help" Japan.

Jesse Johnson, a native of the U.S. state of Nevada who lives in Chiba, north of Tokyo, was eating at a sushi restaurant with his wife when the quake hit.

"At first it didn't feel unusual, but then it went on and on. So I got myself and my wife under the table," he told The Associated Press. "I've lived in Japan for 10 years, and I've never felt anything like this before. The aftershocks keep coming. It's gotten to the point where I don't know whether it's me shaking or an earthquake."

NHK said more than 4 million buildings were without power in Tokyo and its suburbs.

As night fell, Tokyo's streets were jammed with cars, buses and trucks trying to get around and out of the city. Pedestrians swarmed the sidewalks to walk home, or at least find a warm place to spend the night as the temperatures dropped.

Tomoko Suzuki and her elderly mother stood on a crowded downtown corner, unable to get to their 29th-floor condominium because the elevator wasn't working. They unsuccessfully tried to hail a taxi to a relative's house and couldn't find a hotel room.

"We are so cold," said Suzuki. "We really don't know what to do."

A large fire erupted at the Cosmo oil refinery in the city of Ichihara and burned out of control with 100-foot (30-meter) flames whipping into the sky.

"Our initial assessment indicates that there has already been enormous damage," Chief Cabinet Secretary Yukio Edano said. "We will make maximum relief effort based on that assessment."

He said the Defense Ministry was sending troops to the hardest-hit region. A utility aircraft and several helicopters were on the way.

Also in Miyagi prefecture, a fire broke out in a turbine building of a nuclear power plant, but it was later extinguished, said Tohoku Electric Power Co.

A reactor area of a nearby plant was leaking water, the company said. But it was unclear if the leak was caused by the tsunami or something else. There were no reports of radioactive leaks at any of Japan's nuclear plants.

Jefferies International Ltd., a global investment banking group, estimated overall losses of about $10 billion.

Hiroshi Sato, a disaster management official in northern Iwate prefecture, said officials were having trouble getting an overall picture of the destruction.

"We don't even know the extent of damage. Roads were badly damaged and cut off as tsunami washed away debris, cars and many other things," he said.

The U.S. Geological Survey said the 2:46 p.m. quake was magnitude 8.9, the biggest to hit Japan since record-keeping began in the late 1800s and one of the biggest ever recorded in the world.

The quake struck at a depth of six miles (10 kilometers), about 80 miles (125 kilometers) off the eastern coast, the agency said. The area is 240 miles (380 kilometers) northeast of Tokyo. Several quakes hit the same region in recent days, including one measured at magnitude 7.3 on Wednesday that caused no damage.

A tsunami warning was extended to a number of areas in the Pacific, Southeast Asia and Latin America, including Japan, Russia, Indonesia, New Zealand and Chile. In the Philippines, authorities ordered an evacuation of coastal communities, but no unusual waves were reported.

Thousands fled homes in Indonesia after officials warned of a tsunami up to 6 feet (2 meters) high, but waves of only 4 inches (10 centimeters) were measured. No big waves came to the Northern Mariana Islands, a U.S. territory, either.

The first waves hit Hawaii about 9 a.m. EST (1400 GMT). A tsunami about 7 feet (2.1 meters) high was recorded on Maui and a wave at least 3 feet (a meter) high was recorded on Oahu and Kauai. Officials warned that the waves would continue and could get larger.

Japan's worst previous quake was a magnitude 8.3 temblor in 1923 in Kanto that killed 143,000 people, according to USGS. A 7.2-magnitude quake in Kobe in 1996 killed 6,400 people.

Japan lies on the "Ring of Fire" — an arc of earthquake and volcanic zones stretching around the Pacific where about 90 percent of the world's quakes occur, including the one that triggered the Dec. 26, 2004, Indian Ocean tsunami that killed an estimated 230,000 people in 12 nations. A magnitude-8.8 temblor that shook central Chile in February 2010 also generated a tsunami and killed 524 people.

___

Associated Press writers Jay Alabaster, Mari Yamaguchi, Tomoko A. Hosaka and Yuri Kageyama in Tokyo; Jaymes Song in Honolulu and Mark Niesse in Ewa Beach, Hawaii, and Seth Borenstein in New York contributed to this report.

6 Years Ago

I wouldn’t call it stupidity or a reason just to be IN. I’m looking at it now and never regret even once. I had my reason before for having this first design.

This is the explanation of my first tattoo.

The cross or Ankh is an egyptian hieroglypic character that means “life”. The strokes around it like fire are the strokes of life that I’ve been through. Inside that cross is a red inked letters *couldn’t clearly see in the picture* - “JACCR” – initials of the most important people in my life. J for Janette, my mom. My sisters A-pple, C-andy, C-riz. My then-BF-now-Hubby R-ommel.

I have another design now at hand which is cheska’s name in Arabic. I’m just waiting for another chance to have it. Another is a small black butterfly in memory of our baby nathan and another one for the little kulit aom. We’ll see if everything will fall into place.

A Sign

I’m a very emotional person and I guess I wouldn’t argue with someone if they tell me that I am so dramatic. But I’ve never rely or believe in signs. Like those people who asked for them so they’ll feel that their questions or prayers has been answered. I guess it’s more of assuring themselves that they we’re not being ignored. But last night, it somehow turn me into a believer. While sadness is eating me up again remembering baby Nathan, I couldn’t help but cry. Accepting something like this is not at all easy. Tears will always well up for just any reason. The sadness will always be part of me now. The thing is, when we are already sad, we have this habit of listening to sad songs or looking at the old photos or going back to the memories that makes us even more melancholic. Or like me, visiting google and typing great poems for bereavement. Isn’t it pathetic? Maybe not. I guess, we are only trying to find a way to release the desolation we’re feeling through tears. And I was glad when I stumble upon this beautiful poem I posted on my blog last night. While reading, a black small butterfly was flying around the room. We don’t have any idea where it came from. I was happy. And first thing that came into me is baby Nathan. But suddenly, Cheska cried as she got scared. The I said to the butterfly: “if it’s you baby nathan, thank you. don’t worry about us now. We love you. you”. We opened the door of our room and it didn’t flew out. I said again, “You can go now baby. Your achie is really scared. Thank you” Moment later, we never saw the butterfly again. Thank you Lord for putting hope into our hearts and looking at small irrelevant things as our way out of our grief for a while. This kind of things may sound funny or total coincidence for others, but it means a lot to me. I won’t call it a sign but rather a ray of sunshine in a very dim tunnel.

Baby Nathan’s 40 Days

I don't want to remember that day as the saddest day of our life because we're sure that's not how you want us to be ... but d heartaches, prince nathaniel,  o promise me that you'll continue to guide your mommy and daddy because there will always be times that they’ll long for your scent, for your cries, for your warmth, for your presence... we love you baby nathan... we miss you so much...

a beautiful poem i stumble upon on the internet

Daddy please don't look so sad,
Mommy please don't cry,
Cause I am in the arms of Jesus and
He sings me lullabies.
Please try not to question God,
Don't think He is unkind.
Don't think He sent me to you,
And then He changed His mind.
You see, I am a Special Child,
And I am needed up above,
I'm the special gift you gave Him,
The product of your love.
I'll always be there with you,
And watch the sky at night
Find the brightest star that's gleaming,
That's my halo's brilliant light
You'll see me in the morning frost,
That mists your windowpane.
That's me, in the summer showers,
I'll be dancing in the rain.
When you feel a gentle breeze,
From a gentle wind that blows,
That's me, I'll be there, Planting a kiss on your nose.
When you see a child playing,
And your heart feels a little tug,
That's me, I'll be there, giving your heart a hug.
So, daddy, please don't look so sad,
Mommy don't you cry.
I'm in the arms of Jesus,
and He sings me lullabies.

Voyage de la Vie

Each time we go to Resorts World Sentosa, we always passed by the grandiose sign near the Casino which bears the title "Voyage de la Vie". I knew back then that it's really impossible for us to watch the show because one, it's a bit pricey and two it is pricey. So I was ecstatic last Friday when dadi came home showing me this 2 complimentary tickets from his basketball team mate. And he said the guy is giving out 1 ticket for each member and dadi refuses to accept at first because he said "wag na lang mainggit si misis" har-har. Good thing there were members who were not either interested to watch the show or too busy to go out on a Sunday. Yay!

 

So on with the show. Voyage de la Vie or "journey of life" in french is really amazing. Honestly, I was expecting the show to be a bit more of "Phantom of the Opera" kind of thing. I guess I was too excited about the idea of watching the show and not the one I was going to watch. We were surprised that our seats are on the third row and not third row from the back seat! Although, it's good to see everything in front, we couldn't see the entire stage and numbers on the stage. It doesn't matter though. Being in front makes us feel like we are part of the show. And we were which you'll find out later on.

The Story (taken from the brochure and review from CNA)

The Boy (Jonathan Leong, Singapore Idol runner up) who feels trapped in a 9 to 5 desk job *strangely familiar isn't it?* met the Game Master (Kevin Carpenter) who introduces him to the mysterious Lantern Keeper (Viktor Kee) who becomes the Boy's guide on a journey through his imagination. The Boy encounters many extraordinary characters like Love, Temptation, Conflict, Life and Death.

 

Photo taking is not allowed but I managed to stole 2 shots using my phone but it was really blurry as I don't want any warning from the attendants. I did enjoy the show - so much - so I'm hoping my words will give you enough notion of the beauty of the show. But it's really impossible for me to put into words what these amazing people can do. They had entertain us to the maximum level and made our hearts stopped from the dangerous acts they did. I know they enjoyed much of what they're doing but it seem to be pretty tiring for me with all those movements and all. Plus the fact that even if I started practicing those things, I know it'll eventually end me on an encased cot or hospitalized.

 

The Marvelous Acts

The Game Master (Kevin Carpenter) who is a contortionist who moves as if there is no single bone attached in his body makes me hold on to my seat. The valet dance performance made me feel like I've been wanting to do this dance since I was a child even if it never crosses my mind before. The trapeze act (Aurelia Cat) makes me hulky green with that lean body of hers and not feeling dizzy at all with all those hanging from the high ceiling using her butt or feet to hold on to the bar. The rope aerialist (Lina Aunola) made us all think that it's fun and it's not dangerous at all to swing several meters off the ground. The Juggler (Viktor Kee), who juggles the balls, all 7 of them, as if they're all attached to some string and moves like a wind along with the time he throws some of the balls makes me yearn to do it and try which of course I would never be able to do even with a single piece of ball. And what I'm highlighting here is the best act, in my opinion, of all these remarkable stunts. The Death (Martti Peltonen) with a crossbow in hand hitting the red cloth held by the girl looks monotonous in the "circus" world isn't it?  How about a piece of playing card again held by the girl but this time, the Death is facing opposite his target with only a tiny mirror in hand? What about him hitting the target with the crossbow on the right hand and a simple piece of wood on the left hand, only to realize that the target he hit is another crossbow that will release a bow to hit that piece of wood he's holding? But what made me utter a simple safety prayer *hahaha* and putting my bag in front of dadi *if he hits his head, then it's really time lol* is his final act. A round line up of cross-bows with one main in the middle with the bow lit up just in time to release and hit one of the many targets and then hitting another target again until the final bow hits the apple placed on top of the Death. The apple maintain to intact it's whole facade inspite of that "hole". We know because it was given to us as a souvenir. We throw it after we took a picture of it :) His geometry teacher must be so proud of him. Oh, by the way, there were barriers placed around the stage to keep those arrows from hitting anyone from the audience. Right, we felt really really safe. They are all dangerously crazy and astonishing and to simply describe them in words will be injustice to them.

 

The show lasted for almost 2 hours and it's enough to entertain us. We both loved it and we certainly recommend it for anyone to watch it. The best seat I guess is in the middle where you can appreciate everything that's happening on the stage. The cheapest ticket is $68 and the most expensive is $128. Not bad for a show like that. And we were lucky to be given a complimentary tickets, I know. And I'm really grateful to our sponsor. The shows are From Wed to Sunday, 8:30 PM. They are now selling souvenirs at a discounted price because I read somewhere that this show is ending on 31st March. I managed to get myself some goodies to add it in my collection *our most prized collection are the shot glasses and pencils/pens which we've collected over the years of being blessed to travel to places*

 

There's not much photos so don't bother scrolling down :D Just go and book your tickets now! :D

 

 

  

 

OCBC Cycle 2011

A first for Dadi hooray! We didn’t managed to watch though as it’s too early :p
It was held yesterday and he left home at 7AM.

Cheska @ Gymboree

Last night was bebe's first time to play in a "kid's haven" at Gymboree at Harbourfront. Sadly, there were only about 4 kids there and all of them are busy playing by themselves with all the toys around. Cheska's so happy with the things she could do. When one baby was trying to reach her ball, I was surprised that she handed it to the baby gently and was not "madamot". I was hoping to enroll her so she could learn to interact more and learn her alphabets and numbers and shapes but I'm not sure if enrolling her is a good idea. I don't want her to feel the pressure of school yet or dreading through the time she was in there that some kids might bully her or worst she bullying them :D. We might try this per session thing first and then we'll see from there if both of us can handle it. I think she enjoy the whole hour of playing there. Well, she should :p. It costs us $20 bucks lol. It's only $12 for members but membership will cost us another $50.

 

 

50 Books to Read Before You Die

The Lord of the Rings Trilogy - J.R.R. Tolkien
1984 - George Orwell Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen
The grapes of wrath - John Steinback
To Kill a mockingbird - Harper Lee
Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte
Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte
A passage to India - E.M. Forster
The Lord of the Flies - William Golding
Hamlet - William Shakespeare
A Bend in the River - V.S. Naipul
The Great Gatsby - F. Scott Fitzgerald
The Catcher in the Rye - J.D. Salinger The Bell Jar - Sylvia Plath
Brave New World - Aldous Huxley
The Diary of Anne Frank - Anne Frank Don Quixote - Miguel de Cervantes
The Bible - Various
The Canterbury Tales - Geoffrey Chaucer
Ulysses - James Joyce
The Quiet American - Graham Greene Birdsong - Sebastian Faulks
Money - Martin Amis
Harry Potter Series - J.K. Rowling Moby Dick - Herman Melville
The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame
His Dark Materials Trilogy - Philip Pullman Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy
Alice's Adventures in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll
Rebecca - Daphne du Maurier
The Curious Incident of the Dog In the Night-Time - mark haddon On the Road - Jack Kerouac
Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad
The Way We Live Now - Anthony Trollope
The Outsider - Albert Camus
The Colour Purple - Alice Walker
Life of Pi - Yann Martel Frankenstein - Mary Shelley
The War of the Worlds - H.G. Wells
Men Without Women - Ernest Hemingway
Gulliver's Travels - Jonathan Swift
A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens
Huckleberry Finn - Mark Twain
Robinson Crusoe - Daniel Defoe
One flew over the cuckoo's nest - Ken Kesey
Catch 22 - Joseph Keller
The Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas
Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden The Divine Comedy - Aligheri Dante
The Picture of Dorian Gray - Oscar Wilde

JP Collection

Others may not share the same passion I have for JP’s stories, and even after hearing bad reviews on his books, I still am much engrossed with him. So here I am, still trying to do my best to complete my JP collection. But I felt like each time I managed to check off the list one book, there’s another new book coming out. Sigh. Sana tulungan ako ni santa makumpleto ito. Book sale please MPH!

ALEX CROSS SERIES

Along Came a Spider (1992)

Kiss the Girls (1994)

Jack and Jill (1996)

Cat & Mouse (1997)

Pop Goes the Weasel (1999)

Roses Are Red (2000)

Violets Are Blue (2001)

Four Blind Mice (2002)

Big Bad Wolf (2003)

London Bridges (2004)

Mary, Mary (2005)

Cross (2006)

Double Cross (2007)

Cross Country (2008)

Alex Cross's Trial

I, Alex Cros

Witch & Wizard

Worst Case

9th Judgement (2010)

 

WOMEN’S MURDER CLUB

10th Anniversary
The 9th Judgment (2010)
The 8th Confession (2009)
7th Heaven (2008)
The 6th Target (2007)
The 5th Horseman (2006)
4th of July (2005)
3rd Degree (2004)
2nd Chance (2002)
1st to Die (2001)

 

MICHAEL BENNETT
Tick Tock (2011)
Worst Case (2010)
Run For Your Life (2009)
Step on a Crack (2007)

 

MAXIMUM RIDE
Angel
Fang (2010)
Max
The Final Warning (2008)
Saving the World & Other Extreme Sports (2007)
School's Out-Forever (2006)
The Angel Experiment (2005)

DANIEL X
Demons and Druids
Watch the Skies (2009)
The Dangerous Days of Daniel X (2008)

WITCH & WIZARD
The Gift (2010)
Witch & Wizard (2009)

 

OTHERS

The Thomas Berryman Number (1976)
Season of the Machete (1977)
The Midnight Club (1988)
Hide & Seek (1996)
Miracle on the 17th Green (1996)
See How They Run (1997) *in 976 as The Jericho Commandment*
When the Wind Blows (1998)
Black Friday (2000) *in 1986 as Black Market*
Cradle & All (2000) *in 1980 as Virgin
Suzanne's Diary for Nicholas (2001)
Beach House (2002)
The Jester (2003)
The Lake House (2003)
Sam's Letters to Jennifer (2004)
Santa Kid (2004)
Honeymoon (2005)
Lifeguard (2005)
Beach Road (2006)
Judge and Jury (2006)
The Quickie (2007)
You've Been Warned (2007)
Sundays at Tiffany's (2008)
Sail (2008)
Against Medical Advice (2008)
The Murder of King Tut (2009)
Don't Blink (2010)
Private (2010)
Postcard Killers (2010)
Cross Fire (2010)

Cheska @ 19 Months

Main highlight: Not yet eating rice or ulam. Still into milk/biscuits/bread kind of thing. I was advised to try to force so you'll get used to the idea of eating rice. We tried last night but you screamed like crazy and we were so embarassed with all our housemates. You are funny and makulit. Going home to you each day seems to be the most awaited time of my whole day from work. Playing with you and tickling you and you making mami and dadi laugh at your jokes in your own little way washes away the tiredness we felt from working 8 hours in the office. I love how you and dadi fight over TV when it's basketball season and you screamed "bahney" on him. Who won? Of course no doubt, it's always you! Whenever I look at you and thinking how fast time is flying by, I always thought of just staying at home and teach you alphabets and numbers and shapes. We will always fight from time to time and I will always lose my patience *i have a very thin line when it comes to patience :)* but I know that we will always have a great time bonding and spending time together doing things and making sure you're on the right track of learning what kids your age knows these days. But I have to work. And I know and trust that God has given you enough wisdom to learn them one by one. I love how every night we make it a habit to pray before going to sleep. Thank you for this joy little one. Now I understand the happiness and joy of being a parent.

Church of St Mary of the Angels

Last night was our first time to go to church of St Mary of the Angels *given that it’s in Bukit Batok hehe*, as we attended a seminar on baptism where dadi will be one of Chelsean’s  (naynay’s new little prince) ninongs.

To be honest, when I first came in, I don’t feel like I’m inside a church. It’s weird because I didn’t see any crucifix or images of Mary to think that the Church’s name is St Mary. it’s really a huge place with a high ceiling. The only image you could see is that huge image of Jesus Christ hanging in mid-air which scared me at first *maybe because of the book I just read*. Dadi and I was wondering if it’s really a catholic church although they are providing baptismal service there.

When the priest started on the seminar, explaining us about baptism and the structure of the church, I’ve never understand some of the details in baptism better that how he had explained it. Either the priest is really good or God just showed me that where I am is still a house of God no matter how “modern” it looks. I am looking forward to this Sunday to go back to this church.

I took the liberty of borrowing these photos from the church’s website.

it’s really rare to see a priest from Singapore who looks like really enjoying his profession and could explain everything to people without losing their attention

 
In the middle of the church was this “baptism pond” where the baby can be dipped. beside it was another bigger version for adults’ baptism.

Trial by JP

This book makes me fell in love with JP again. he's truly a remarkable story teller. I felt all the anguish and pain of the story as if i was there seeing everything that's happening. books are really interesting when you know that you're learning something that you've never know existed.

Lynching in 19th century is really sad. I’m glad I’m living in this generation. There's too much fear and sadness and death that's too much to handle.

This is a really good read even if you haven't read any of the Alex Cross' series. I don’t actually think this is related to Alex Cross at all. :) Still, please include this in your must read book list.

Panaginip

From the recent events happening in Libya, and continuous updates through texts from my Nanay, I can’t help but feel worried about my Tatay. He’s our very dear uncle whom I’ve always looked up to. He’d been the father that my dad never was. From the last update, Nanay sent me sms that Tatay is already safe and away from the danger in Libya. I don’t know how far or near he is from where he stays and sometimes or most of the times, news doesn’t give specific details. But it was a big relief when I learned that he and other fellow kababayans are in Malta now. Last night, I dreamt about Tatay. He was not alive and a friend was the one continually texting Nanay pretending to be Tatay as requested by him. It was not as vivid as any other dreams but the “thud” on my heart was still there when I woke up. I prayed intently to God that He won’t take another love from our life. Sometimes, it’s best to dream about these kind of things because you were given a chance to pray for them that they’ll be safe. Unlike with baby nathan where we didn’t have any clue that he will be taken away from us. Tatay is now only waiting for a ticket, apparently from the philippine government so they can go home but after 3 days, still nothing. I hope he will be able to go home sooner.

Cheska's First Time to Singapore Zoo

It was a long time plan since bebe C was able to recognize animals from the pictures and could able to say some of them. The plan was finally realized yesterday. We arrived at the zoo past 2 already but we still enjoyed the "family bonding". No yaya and we survived! I can't put in words the happiness I felt seeing Cheska with so much joy that time. It's really priceless. The shriek of glee whenever she see familiar animals that she only see in the pictures and TV is undeniably invaluable. When we watched the animal friends show she literally jump for joy when she saw the dogs closely. After the show, we let her touched the dogs she loved them! The kids playground inside the zoo is superb :) Even I, enjoyed the look and feel of the place. For Cheska, she wasn't afraid of the dogs, the cat, the horse and the goat but she is strangely scared of the bubbles lol. We let her play in the kid's area where there is a mini pool for the kids. I don't know where this kid get her energy but my guess is from the thrill of the new experience she had. I hope she will always be a kid at heart - one who easily enjoys the simple beauty of life. We felt so tired physically but the exhaustion is nothing compares to seeing her beautiful smile :) We ended the night having dinner at Nando's at Plaza Singapura. Thank you dadi for spoiling your girls.

 

more photos at her multiply site.

God wants me to know…

On this day of your life, Faye, we believe God wants you to know ... that there are no accidents. What you think of as accidents are simply your conversations with God that you haven't yet been able to understand. But take heart, all happens in God's will and every conversation has deep meaning for you.

 

Is this the “answer” that I’ve been waiting to hear from you?

Just go with it

When we watched movie, we never check out reviews or recommendations from anyone. We watched what we feel like watching. Because for us, some movies that are so funny for other people could be just ok for us and vice versa. Movies were appreciated by people with different taste. So whenever someone asked me if a particular movie is good, I say my own verdict of the movie.

Any Adam Sandler movie makes me laugh. The kind that I get teary eyed because I don’t want to laugh hysterically. When habidadi bought the ticket, I had no idea it was AS’s movie. Adding up Jennifer Aniston made it more enjoyable. I’d love to watch it again and again. Plus it has some kilig scenes. Sometimes, if you want to enjoy the movie, don’t bother looking into the details of the story. Have fun laughing at the jokes and be in love with the cheesy lines. It’s like enjoying a Friday night out with your friends.

Heart’s Day

So as not to make this blog feel the melancholic of the departure of our little angel, mama faye will still continue blogging about everything. Know that you’ll always be here in our hearts, bunso. Always be remembered. Happy heart’s day our little cupid.

For years that Mr. A and I had been together, it’s rare that we go out on valentines day itself even when we were just starting. First, we wanted to avoid the crowd. Secondly, we don’t want to do the very cliché valentines date, no offense to those who do. Thirdly, I hate seeing flowers everywhere I look. Honestly, I don’t like flowers. They wither. They are exorbitantly pricey *here in Singapore*. And they are good for few weeks but afterwards they are good for nothing but trash. But here’s the big BUT. I “ooooh” whenever I see guys taking the effort to buy and bring and give them to their partners. I smile whenever I see heart shaped helium balloons or one single red rose or a teddy bear. It always brought me back to my high school days. :) I like the idea of flowers on a valentines day on other people. And I like seeing the imaginary little hearts floating in the air every 14th of the second month of the year :)

Anyway, we went out last friday and went to Que Pasa - our used-to-be hangout place – to have a little date. Our feet just took us there. We were glad to found a vacant place outside because we love to do people-watching game. We were ecstatic to see that my favorite beef stew is back! Hooray!

As for today, V day, we were home by 9, had pinoy style bistek and watched “Gullivers Travel” *thanks ami!* with baby C and it was the perfect valentines date for me. Well, until she got bored *after only 15 minutes!* and took out all her toys. :D A perfect date is not about the fancy restaurant or the beautiful bouquet but the person or the people you’re with during this time of the month.

Happeeeee V Day everyone! Spread the love!

Baby Nathan’s 2nd Week

I never thought I'd dreaded Saturday in my entire life. It has been my favorite day of the week for the past years. It's the 2nd week now since I got that call which I wish never happened. Whenever I was asked before if ever there were any regrets in my life that I have, I always answered that I don't want anything to change in my life may it be good or bad because they all have been a factor of where I am and what I am now. But this is one exception that I so wanted to go back to. I will do anything to make our angel go back again. To make sister A not feel the pain and whatever she's going through now. She's strong, I know that. And I may be miles away from them for a very long time and Im aware that I don't know them well enough but I know when they're hurting. I know how painful it is to lose someone. To lose a child. Honestly, I really don't care whatever plans He have for her right now. I just can't stand knowing my little sister is hurting.

 

We miss you Biboy. We miss the idea of planning your 1st birthday party. I miss the idea of planning on buying baby stuff for you. I miss the idea of knowing that you're just around. Our life goes on. But it will never be the same. Losing you will always crept up in our minds while having fun or when we're being idle. I wish you will recognize Mama Faye when we see each other again. I wish I could tell you so many things that I never got the chance here on earth.

 

For now, I will try to accept the fact that there is a greater reason why you were taken back early.

Baby Nathan's 9th Day

Today marks our little angel's 9th. My heart is still aching for losing him. It's aching for I know how painful it is for my sisters and mamu who've been taking care of him since day 1. It's aching because I can't imagine how sister A is surviving each day. The suddenness of what had transpire in our family is too much to bear. I haven't totally mourn for his loss because I know the people he had left behind needed me to be strong for them. My bereavement is focus on uplifting their already dampen spirits. But I'm not strong. And I haven't accepted the fact that he's gone. But I don't want my family to know that. I have to show them that life goes on, even if I, myself believe, that it will stop eventually, at least for a while.

 

Of course all of us believe that GOD has reasons why certain things happen but I want to know why. My heart is filled with questions that I know won't be answered by anyone or anything except GOD. I am accepting the fact that a little angel has to be taken away from us because he was not ours in the first place. He was only loaned to us from above. But I want to know why he was lend to us and be taken away only after 2 months? Please don't judge me or be mad at me for asking questions. I know and I believe that only you have the power to give and take things rightfully. I'm only asking now to let me try to understand why so I can fully give my strength to them.

 

I'm sorry Baby Nathan. I hope I'm not making you worry too much about us down here. I know you're playing now happily in heaven. No more 24/7 tummy ache. We missed you so much. And I know your mom and mamu and mama kris and mama kendz and ate ayesha and daddy do a lot more than I do. Please help to ask Papa Jesus to heal their aching hearts. Your mom is a strong person - way too strong to go through a lot of things in life that I know I can't handle. But even superman gets weak with the kryptonite. So I'm hoping that this kryptonite moment of her life will eventually pass.

 

I love you sweet angel. Thank you for letting me hold you for few days. Thank you for waking me up on that few days to sing you to sleep and touch your tummy so it won't hurt. Thank you for holding on to my thumb when i touched your hands. Thank you for letting me feel the warmth of your small frail body. I wish it wasn't that soon but some things has to be done. Please keep on guiding your mom and dad so they will continue to go on with their lives and make things right. Please keep on guiding your tita's and lola so they will be able to accept that it is not their fault why we lost you. Please keep on guiding your ate ayesha so she won't cry and hold on to your picture till she gets older although keeping the memory of you will make her stronger. Please keep on guiding me so I will find my way to my why's.

 

After office, I went to Novena church to at least pray for Baby Nathan. I didn’t know that it will be a place for me to relieve some of the heavy burden in my heart. I guess the prayers we asked our friends are more for me and my family especially sister A than Baby Nathan. Maybe because we all know that he is in heaven now.