Nights in Rodanthe

I read the book and found it to be really dragging. I love NS and I've read most of his books. I just found this one really boring. I mean I did cry for some parts but most of the time I was really looking forward to finish the book just bec I was hoping the ending is good. But it's not. It's the first time I got disappointed with a book. No offense to NS and especially to the readers who really loved the book. Im a huge NS fan but this particular story I'd really wanted to forget. I bought a DVD on sale hoping the movie will put justice to it. But it didn't. There were a lot of good things from the book that was omitted. A widows love for her late husband, a daughters love for her father and the love of a man for her late wife. Those parts were so good. In fact, I think the only good thing in the book. Inspite of this terrible particular book, I will still complete my NS collection and read and watch the movie adaptations. Hoping this is the only rotten tomato among the bunch.

Sentiments

there was a time in my life that i felt the joy and pain of being a parent to my siblings. more of like the "father" since i was there with them financially and not at times they really needed someone. i couldn't even say that i've been a sister to them since i never really knew them for that long. and i couldn't say that im proud of any of it. i was just trying to play the part that God asked me to. i don't even feel like i have the "authority" to tell them what's good and what's not for their life. but sometimes when they did a decision in their life, i had this feeling that i thought they owe me something - at least shaping their life into what you think is best for them. and when it's going the other way around, i felt cheated or moreso HURT. i guess, i have to accept the fact that what i thought would make them happy isn't really making them happy. they have their own life to live just as i had mine. im just praying hardly to God to be with them and guide them every step of the way just as He did to me. I'm not saying my life is perfect now. but i somehow had that notion that i passed what was expected of me. if it's hard for me, it must be million times for my mom. i wish cheska will go easy on me when she grows up.

Trip to ICA

This morning’s attempt to re-appeal baby Cheska’s PR application wasn’t what you called fruitful. I thought we will be talking to someone to reasoned out Cheska’s rejected application. It still is better to get rejected knowing the grounds than receiving a plain letter with only “Sorry, you application has been denied”. Anyway, we submitted the re-appeal form with the re-appeal letter we made and then we proceed to 4th floor where we applied for her extension. She got extended alright but only until end of May. Re-appeal takes another 6 months processing. Now, we were advised to apply for a long term pass for her. OMG! This is really really troublesome. I still can’t accept the fact that they can reject a PR application of a baby. Way to go Singapore! I love Singapore. Woooo-hooo! Hooooray!

Sad

We got the letter from ICA regarding bebe’s PR application. It was applied last October and we were just at the ICA last January which they said it was impossible for a baby to get denied especially if both parents are PR. But how come in the letter it reads “we regret to inform you that your application was unsuccessful”. I hope tomorrow when I call ICA, it’ll be something like “Sorry there was just a mistake. Your baby’s application is successful” But to be honest, THIS will be a big change in all of our lives. Sorry, can’t help it but be really sad and think of the could-have-been’s.

 

I wanted to cry but I know dadi b will only tell me there’s nothing to cry. But I really really felt sad. :(

Au Revoir, Toffee

Heard the news from sister K that our first baby Toffee was gone. I haven’t talked to her and she hasn’t replied to my sms yet as to what was the cause of Toffee’s demise. I know, if anyone will be devastated, it will be bunso. Toffee’s her real baby :( Goodbye, Toffee. If there’s a thing called dog-heaven, I’m sure that’s where you’ll be going :( Good riddance to the sweetest, smelliest and playful dog I’ve ever known. Say hello to Marley for us.

 

A sad sad day for everyone

today is the 2nd day. many of us still can't believe she's gone. many of us wanted to believe that it never happen, that she's now home taking care of baby coby.  close or not, it's a big shock just to know she's gone at the age of 27 or 28. to know how she never even got to half of a full life in this world. i don't know which one makes my heart ache - the things I've said about her or because i cant imagine the pain of the family she left behind especially our good friend bogs. now, i guess it would take years before we see the smile on his face, the excitement and happiness whenever he tells us his plans about his baby and wife. it's all sudden. I'm not related to any of them. i don't even know E's maiden name at first. i don't even know E that much. having said that i wonder why did i cried so much the moment i heard the news and why do i still feel lump in my throat and get teary eyed every time i remember E’s gone now and knowing how my friend bogs is taking it. it’s just so sad :( really really sad.

why do extreme pain like this happen to good people? wait no, i guess i don’t want to hear any other answer to that question. because honestly, the answer that I'm looking for and the only answer that i wanted to hear is this –> “wait, I'm sorry. this kind of pain shouldn't happen. you don’t deserve it. let’s click a bit of rewind.” and then voila, everything is back to how it should be. no pain. i don’t like pain in any form as much as i hate heartaches. i don’t like the words “everything happens for a reason” or “it will make you strong” because let me tell you this, i don’t think making someone so weak by hitting them so hard in their chest makes them stronger. and wait, stronger for what? another heartache? and what could be that most wonderful reason that this thing has to happen? i’m not being cynical or anything. i guess, this is the only thing in life that i really really don’t understand. my faith is still intact, don’t worry. i just can’t seem to see the clarity of the reason why this has to happened. :(

Bogs, i don’t have the best of sympathy words to say. i don’t know how much pain you felt right now. let your heart cry out. let it bleed. let it feel the pain. let it numb. eventually, somehow, somewhere, it will heal. it might take you forever but you’ll find the intensity of it all gradually diminishing. keep the love and your memories with E alive. be sad when you feel the stab again. you’ll feel happiness again because you deserver it. and we are all praying for it. may God give you much strength to endure this. you have so many friends grieving with you and praying for you. i hope you’ll make it through. GOD BLESS.

E, we may have not shared a moment together but I feel like i know so much about you because of bogs. if you’re still here, i would tell you how much he loves you. he doesn’t say it to us, but i know he does. he talk so much about you. how you love to buy clothes and hang them in your closet which after few days, tags are still intact. how you love small cute little things. how he go out of his way to buy the 10 bucks worth of box with cutesy girly stuff in it just because he knows you like it. how he was so happy when you found out your pregnant. and the worried look on his face each time he tells us about some minor implications on your pregnancy. how he can’t stop telling us his plan of bringing you and baby back here in singapore. take care of bogs and baby while you’re away. i know you will guide them forever. you’re a great loss in this world. your smile and pretty face will never be forgotten. we’ll miss you terribly.

Passport to Freedom

I have been complaining *a lot* lately and I know it’s not proper to think that I’m still lucky I have one. But it’s really really tiring and giving me a lot of stress. I know they always say “be careful for what you wish for” and I’m really trying to be careful. I’ve been trying so hard not to give up. But it’s like I’ll burst one day. And before that happens, I so wanted to have something to look forward to before I leave that part of my world where proper sleep is really rare and family time isn’t included in the dictionary. I have taken that tiny step, of updating my passport to freedom. Hopefully, I’ll have the time especially the courage to try it one more time. I couldn’t say that this is my comfort zone because believe me it’s really far from that. I guess I’m staying because I have to. I’m not really complaining about the work and you know what it is if it’s not the work. I hope God is with me on this one. I have plan B but to put this into action will rock not just my world but also those around me. And this is that kind of plan that I’ll only do as a last resort.

On Books

From time to time, my obsession with collecting books, not just reading them, came running through my mind, making me spent endless hours in the bookstores or visit websites of my favourite authors or visit sites such as this one. I did listed some of them so I’ll know next which one to buy and which one to ditch – well, after reading the no of books I have in line which I have bought from last month’s book sale.

Source: Good Reads

Books that everyone should read at least once

I took out from the list in the website the books that least interests me. In yellow are the books I already owned and read sometime back. Remaining would be on my list of books to have.

To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee 
Anne Frank: The Diary of a Young Girl by Anne Frank
Nineteen Eighty-Four by George Orwell
Animal Farm by George Orwell
The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger 

Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury
Green Eggs and Ham by Dr. Seuss
Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone by J.K. Rowling
Jane Eyre by Charlotte Brontë
Alice's Adventures in Wonderland / Through the ... by Lewis Carroll
The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain
The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini
Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë
The Cat in the Hat by Dr. Seuss
Catch-22 by Joseph Heller
Twilight by Stephenie Meyer
Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom 

The Time Traveler's Wife by Audrey Niffenegger 
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban by J.K. Rowling
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows by J.K. Rowling
Memoirs of a Geisha by Arthur Golden 

The Old Man and the Sea by Ernest Hemingway
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire by J.K. Rowling
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince by J.K. Rowling
A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix by J.K. Rowling
The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho 
The Da Vinci Code by Dan Brown
The Five People You Meet in Heaven by Mitch Albom
The Notebook by Nicholas Sparks 

Matilda by Roald Dahl
Love in the Time of Cholera by Gabriel García Márquez
The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time by Mark Haddon
Eclipse by Stephenie Meyer
The Golden Compass by Philip Pullman 

Atonement by Ian McEwan
Breaking Dawn by Stephenie Meyer
New Moon by Stephenie Meyer 

The Diving Bell and the Butterfly by Jean-Dominique Bauby
James and the Giant Peach by Roald Dahl
Into the Wild by Jon Krakauer
A Farewell to Arms by Ernest Hemingway 

The Story of My Life by Helen Keller
Who Moved My Cheese? by Spencer Johnson 

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory by Roald Dahl
Horton Hears a Who! by Dr. Seuss
The Essential Calvin and Hobbes by Bill Watterson
The Amber Spyglass by Philip Pullman 

Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman 
The Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren
Down and Out in Paris and London by George Orwell
Inkheart by Cornelia Funke 

The Memory Keeper's Daughter by Kim Edwards
My Sister's Keeper by Jodi Picoult 

Dreams from My Father by Barack Obama
Alice in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll
How the Grinch Stole Christmas! by Dr. Seuss
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets by J.K. Rowling
Sam's Letters to Jennifer by James Patterson
Veronika Decides to Die by Paulo Coelho 
Left Behind by Tim LaHaye
The Tipping Point by Malcolm Gladwell
His Dark Materials Trilogy by Philip Pullman
American Gods by Neil Gaiman

Hunt for 1st and 2nd

I’m looking out for the 1st to Die and 2nd Chance book to complete my Women’s Murder Club series by James Patterson.  I’d prefer the one on sale hihihi. And there’s 2 new books, 8th Target and 9th Judgment that I have to wait for the paperback.

   
Next to complete is my Alex Cross collection. So many books, so little time!

Autumn

Autumn left me teary eyed. I don’t know from which part. Lately, everything has been too much. I want so many things. I’m chasing and looking outside my own crib. I don’t have enough at hand and I don’t think I do deserve any of it. Feeling down is just overrated. Then this book – it’s just, something. I would write something better about the book as soon as I finished Winter. I just have to pour a little water inside me so it won’t get flooded inside. I have to accept that change is part of everyone, of anything in this world. I’m way feeling too sentimental about something but even in my own blog I can’t just write it down. I hope when I’m done with Winter, my eyes won’t be blurry anymore so I can see the pictures clearly. The book is titled Have a Little Faith. I guess for me, I need more.

At some point in anyone’s life, we all need someone to turn to. Someone who wouldn’t laugh at our sentimental foolishness. Someone who would, for once, think of what was clouding our mind and what was that hint of sadness that’s filling up our eyes. Someone who would sit down with us and have a cup of coffee and start your conversation with “how are you” with a real concern. Someone who would by just one look they would know that something is bothering you and would take time to know it. I guess, I’m more looking for myself than for that someone.

 

I rant because I do get tired too. I get tired not because I’m not happy with the things I have in my hand now. I’m aching because… well, I’m human.

MITCH ALBOM in SG!

Some of you may know the guy behind the great inspiring novels like "Five People You Meet In Heaven", "For One More Day" especially the "Tuesdays with Morrie" and the new novel "Have a Little Faith". Well, he was here last night at Kinokuniya in Takashimaya. Ive been drooling for this day to come since I've learned that he'll be here for book signing last week. I never thought Id make it but I did. Cuz, Bebit and Priti Miyaw joined me as well. It was set at 7:30 pm but i took off from office at 6:45. I was surprised when cuz sms me that there's a queue no. I was practically running from the bus stop of orchard to takashimaya. Good thing she still managed to get me a queue no. I was trembling with much excitement. I was 19. Shes 10. Miyaws 20 and Bebit is 53. Looking around the room, i thought this wasnt advertised more but as minutes go by, even without mitch yet, the crowds are getting bigger. He was reasonably late for less than 30 minutes. When at 8pm, he finally emerges to the side, and boy I was so excited to see him! The room radiates with something that i cant fully describe. Ok, im a bit exaggerating. When he was in front, he apologized profusely for being late then he started telling everyone a story which I realized later on that that was already the "talk". Its just that when he talks you wont even know minutes passing by. You were too engrossed with what he was saying and hes not even using words that you cant understand. Everything is clear. I got teary eyed when he was telling the story behind the new book keep a little faith. It was trully an amazing experience. Come book signing, thats when the anticipation and excitement started to dragged us along. There was a long queue for the RSVP for the book signing on mitchs left side and on his right is another long queue for the COMMONERS. The RSVP took a long stretch of more than 1 hour to finish. We were a bit worried that his hands are really getting tired signing those books. But hes a good man. He still keep on smiling and answering the peoples questions eventhough we know hes already tired. I dont really know exactly how long weve waited since the waiting game became a bit easy with the girls around. We met an uncle on the queue and asked us if we can take his photo with mitch. He gave us his email address where we can send the photos and hes saying a lot of nice things about filipinos especially those in the healthcare business. Now i truly admire our fellow filipino nurses doing a very good job imprinting to this man a good impression. When it was our turn to have our book signed, I asked mitch to write my name and cheska when he did signed. I wanted to hug him and shake hands with him but shyness took over me. I was star struck! Its not because hes famous or something. I guess, mainly because I know deep down that hes a man full of wisdom and for someone like me to stand there and say something stupid or dumb, Id rather smile and let him signed my books. Oh yeah, by the way, I brought along all my 3 books and bought the new one so he can have it signed. I asked bunso to buy me the new book in manila since its a lot cheaper there but gave in into buying so he can have it signed. Imagine, 4 books signed by the author himself! Im so going to add it in my mini library plan complete with a glass case and perfect lighting and .... Ooopps, hello reality. Anyway, I guess Ill just add it to my collection at the moment and put it on top :) Me, very very very happy!

He looks a lot like Hugh Grant isn’t it? :D

My Sister's Keeper and Sunday's at Tiffany's

Finished "My Sister's Keeper" few weeks ago and the story was really really sad with no happy ending :( I'm now looking for the movie!

As for the "Sunday's at Tiffany's", what can I say, I'm so into James Patterson so it's really a page-turner. A must read for everyone :)

Now reading the Quickie also by James Patterson.

I managed to get few books from the book sale at carrefour hihihi.

Kate Who???

Allow me to brag, ok?

I was just so happy with dadi b’s anniversary gift to me – a Kate Spade bag! I can’t stop taking thousands of pictures of every angle of my new bag. I just so love it! By the way, we celebrated our 11th year anniversary last 25th January as boyfriend and girlfriend and it’s just amazing how we made it this far. I was having a really really really bad day that time and I so wanted to give up things but that’s another story, but dadi b insists on having a quick dinner in spite of my being late. We had dinner at TGIF –yes, it’s here in Singapore now for those who doesn’t know yet. It’s at the Heeren shop. Food is really great but I can’t feel the TGIF-ey feeling like the ambiance in Manila. Labyu dadi b. Thanks for everything. And of course, the one and only best thing that you’ve given me all throughout our years together, it’s baby Cheska. Bags made me happy but bebe cheeks brings me thousand fold bliss. Yay!

HAPPY 11th ANNIVERSARY DADI B! LABYU SO MUCH!

  

Hate article about Cebu Pacific

I’ve been hitting the backspace over and over again trying to fine tune this article but it always ends up with the saddest if not an uglier picture of what happened to us last January 10, 2010 with Cebu Pacific airlines. I am merely pointing my fingers to CEBU PACIFIC STAFF only but we all know how things work – CEBU PACIFIC itself is responsible for the actions of its staff. I have no intention of putting anyone out of job but I have to write this article to at least warn some people about it so they will be prepared or be able to deal with any situation the same as ours. I’ll tell our story as mildly possible as I can as I really get upset each time I remember what happened to my Mom. At the end of it, please do tell me honestly if we are right to be so angry about what happened.

We – me, my husband, my 5 month old baby and my 61 yr old mom – were on a flight back to Singapore from Manila, 5J 801 at 6:25 AM. We arrived at the Terminal 3 and was already at the check-in lane at 5AM. I know some of you will say that we have to be at least 2 or 3 hours before the flight. This part I know, we were wrong to assume that 1 hour is enough. But just last November (my first time to take cebu pacific at terminal 3, I was with my baby and my parents-in-law and we did checked-in an hour before the flight and we didn’t have any trouble. We still managed to have coffee after we checked-in. Nothing was asked with regards to the Singapore pass of baby Cheska. Anyway, while on the queue, my husband asked me to stay while he pays for the travel tax which the cebu pacific staff told us to stay on the line and checked-in first and do the payment of the taxes later. I guess he too assumed that there won’t be any problem. Few minutes later, we were already in front of the counter pleading with the staff to give us consideration with the 3kg excess. As expected, she didn’t give in so we pulled out some stuff from our checked-in bags and put it in our hand carry bags (this, i really don’t understand as it’s still the same 3 kilos we’ll be carrying on the plane with us and they know that pinoys do that). This incident was not the one that caused us delay. It’s the staff’s way of checking us in (and I don't know how many things you have to enter into the computer to checked-in 3 adults and an infant) and asking us so many times the irrelevant stupid question regarding baby cheska’s pass. We’ve told her the first time that baby cheska’s PR application (no matter how stupid the question may seem we still gave her an answer) is still on the process in singapore. She told us that this is important and asked us 2nd time for any paper or supporting document which we replied that it was baby’s 2nd time now to travel back to singapore without any of the “papres/documents” she’s asking. Still, for the third time, she insisted for “any document”. Makulit talaga or nang-aasar ng todo todo. Irritatingly, I asked her the relevance of her question which she replied that we MIGHT HAVE a problem with the immigration. When I said no and told her that it will be our problem, she further delay checking us in. Hubby (who’s the most patient person I’ve known) and I were both wound up. At almost 6AM, she let us pay for the taxes without releasing to us the boarding passes. (My question to those who have parents holding a LTVP, did you also pay Php1650 for the travel tax? I maybe misinformed that we only have to pay the 200 pesos the same amount as what we are paying. This I still have to clarify with some of my friends). After hubby paid the airport taxes and already queuing in the immigration, there is a cebu pacific staff who’s calling out for the 5J 801 passengers, and yes we were the last ones. He’s been standing beside the immigration officer which she called out to him irritatingly “Ano ba, iniistress mo ko ah” (you’re stressing me out). After we have been cleared in the immigration and passing through the scanner thing, he keeps on asking us to hurry and radioing to whoever on the other line and mentioning about 3 or 5 minutes. He even ask hubby not to wear back his shoes. He’s been stressing us all the way to the plane. We we’re carrying heavy hand carry bags and even my 61 year old mom’s been stressed with almost every minute of telling us to hurry. My mom has a heart problem adding to the fact that she’s already 61 and was not used to stress and carrying heavy things in a hurry. I’ve always been on the look out for my Mom but I just couldn’t help her with the bags as I’m carrying baby cheska, my laptop and a small hand carry bag. I saw her half-running, half-walking after the cebu pacific guy. THEN I SAW HER STUMBLE, FACE DOWN :( My heart skipped a beat and I called out to her almost crying. Seconds passed and she was not standing or even moving. I’m definite that she passed out in that few seconds that we’ve been calling out on her. We were frantically running towards her. One guy reached out to her and helped her out before we could reached her. Still, the guy is in a hurry pace towards the plane. When I had a glimpse of her, I saw her lips bleeding and already bruised. Hubby’s already shouting angrily. I was too worried sick about my mom’s safety. I couldn’t check on her yet at that time if what she had was a minor one only so ugly things came running into my mind while walking towards the plane. When we reached the plane, we were embarrassed thinking that the people are already assuming it was us that causes the delay. I checked on my mom and saw her upper left lip were bruised and her gums were bleeding. It was already plump so we asked the flight attendant to give her ice (yes, we have to ask even after they’ve seen what happened to her lips). After  I’ve checked that Mom was fine (thank God but I was still worried. No first aid checks done if that’s what you’re going to ask), I sat down and cried. I just couldn’t contain the emotions of anger and worried about my mom at the same time.

We may be partly to blame for assuming 1 hour is enough but the staff should be well trained and informed. The lady in the checked-in counter should be well informed that even if an infant doesn’t have any valid singapore pass, she can still enter singapore as a tourist with any of the baby’s parents. Or is there any policy to ask this kind of questions that I am not aware of? (i remember the recent news about the special child passenger which they refuse to board the plane. hayyzzz) Aside from that stupid irrelevant question, I don’t know how long should you checked-in  3 adults and an infant but I'm sure it wouldn't take an hour to do that. Unless intentionally prolonged of course. And as for the guy with the radio who thinks he’s Mr.. big shot stressing out people carrying bags let alone carrying an infant and a 61 yr old lady, I think they should undergo training on how to help out older people first if you want them to hurry. But I don't think it’s not obvious that we were all cramming up running after him like obedient dogs. I know they’re only doing their jobs. But a proper training would save both the passenger and the airlines some trouble of facing issues like this.

We have been travelling via cebu pacific a lot of times since they opened a flight from Singapore to Manila. We won’t deny that we are so grateful for the cheap fares as it helped us afford to see our families in manila as often as the need arises. But if having a cheap fare means dealing with anxieties each time you travel back home, I might as well saved up for the not so cheap flights were I can be pampered even for a 3 hour flight only. I have heard a LOT of troubles that cebu pacific had caused but we still choose to fly with them because their fares are really affordable (plus the fact that I don’t have to go to old NAIA airport where I always almost wanted to wipe out the irritating smirks off the immigration officers’ faces and that is a different story). Delayed flights I can deal with though I still find it unacceptable. I have friends who have to adjust their schedules because either their flights got delayed or cancelled or faced with the “over booking” excuse. I MIGHT be able to handle them but with what happened to my mom just because they were not properly trained or they lack knowledge on the real process I’m keeping my word that I will channel all the energy that I have up to the last drop to let at least a fraction of the population of the people I know be informed of what had happened to us.

I have not send any letter to Cebu Pacific and I’m still contemplating to do so. The flight attendant already asked us on what had happened and as advised, she will be filing the report herself along with the form she asked hubby to fill up. I couldn’t find the faith that it will reach their higher management or if it does I’m not sure what actions they will do. They look like they don’t care whatever bad publicity is thrown at them.  I don’t care. But I have my blog to vent out this anger. I’m not asking people to ban taking the airline and I’m sure I don’t have that much power. Even I couldn’t promised myself that I won’t take cebu pacific anymore. But they really have to do something about the ISSUES they’ve caused their customers. It’s a waste to see it sunk just because they couldn’t care less.

I hope this won’t give my mom any trauma. Right now, she’s doing ok. Her upper lip has gone back to it’s normal look but it has left a bluish bruise a size of a 10 cent coin. I took a picture of her bruise but mom asked me not to post it.

Get Together

Though I couldn’t say that last night was our first ever get together after months of being pregnant, I’ll say that it was our first get together over bottle of vodka, wine, martini and baileys hehe.  This was the first time I’d had a drinking session with my friends after being pregnant. It feels good and relaxing after days of battling things at work. BUT I do made sure that I won’t get drunk but enough to feel that alcohol in my veins. Funny how we all forgot to take this kodak moment :) Nevertheless, it was really a fun night. Thank you friends for the visit!

Torn

Jusko I feel like my age is slowly turning back when I always have those kilig moments. This twilight saga is really hitting everyone, and of course that includes yours truly. I felt like someone who’s not double the age of these yummy and hotness kids. Makalaglag- eherm. Eeeeekkk. I’m really a team Edward if I based it on the character in the book and I’m so not into Jacob even after watching him flex those sinful abs. But with this photo - I don’t know. Man, if I’m Bella, I will definitely overly fall for these guys – vampire or werewolf – who cares???? *tulo laway* Why oh why do God create such very very beautiful people and not ever having that chance. Life is really unfair! Sigh and double sigh.

Venting Out

This is something that I’m telling you to skip. I just had to vent out.

It’s been really tough for me the past few days. A lot of production are going on, a lot of must do things at work and a lot of lows. I did a lot of mistakes, though all have been resolved, but still mistake is a mistake. Let me correct myself – it should be mistake with a big “S”. I so wanted to bail out but I can’t. I know it’s not easy to be someone I envy but sometimes a girl like me had to think what i think. There is really no justice in this world. BUT in spite of it all, I have things to be grateful for. Most has been resolved though damage has been done but still. I get to go home to a baby girl with a very warm smile and eyes that looks at you like she really knows what you’ve been through that day. She doesn’t even give me a hard time waking up at times when I needed my sleep very badly. A best friend who took me out to a movie date after months of movie-less and date-less and not just any other movie but NEW MOON! And the last and hopefully not the least, friends who never fails to make me laugh and buy my corny jokes relieving me from my stressful day with only just a few hours of time to spare for a simple dinner and a glass of my first wine *after a year!!!!* No matter how bad and awful my week seems to be, GOD will always make a way to lessen if not removed all these things that’s making my heart really heavy. I’m so thankful!

My 2009 Wishlist

Since it’s already 1st of December, like many other excited ladies, I’m listing down my wishlist for 2009. All of them are just material things of course. It might be too cheesy to list down the things I “really” want not just for this Christmas but for whole year round. So I’ll just focus on the things that money can buy and let me reiterate – only those that my Santa can afford. I wasn’t hoping to get everything on the list. One is enough but who am I to complain? So for those who’ve been asked by my Santa, asked him to read my blog. *which he never did!* Ok here goes my list!
If I can’t have everything, I’ll be very very happy having no. 2 on my list because it seem realistic to me. But if I can have no. 1, I’ll be the happiest person alive *hahaha*

1. Louis Vuitton Neverfull or Canvas Galliera
 
2. Replacement of my lost Elsa Peretti Tiffany necklace
 
3. New Mitch Albom “Have a little faith” book

4. Kate Spade baby bag

5. A BUMBO seat for my princess

6. New shoes of any brand
7. New hair *rebond muna ulit from curls*
8. Le Sport Sac Baby bag


*to be updated everyday hihihi

LTVP-ness and Farewell

I'm so happy that after days of thinking about it, it's finally over. Mom's long term pass was granted few weeks ago and after putting much effort into the requirements, seeing her ID this morning made me happy. She's now legal to stay here with us! Having Cheska around surely brings us much blessings. Though not all that we desire, we know that there are reasons behind it. Lose some, gain some. Life is not how much you lose and how much you don't have. It is how much you gain and how much you have. As bunso puts it, God has reasons for everything. I've been so busy thinking about a lot of things that it just hit me (with Mars' sms) after four months of kulitan and lakwatsahan, back to what it used to be ulit. I wanted to ask questions but I'm just letting them be for the meantime. Tonight, we'll be sending off bunso. I hope there will still be a lot of answered prayers that will come our way especially in her life. We'll miss you Mama Cris :( See you on thursday again.

Cleaning Out My Closet

For all those years I've stayed here in Singapore, I've accumulated a lot of things - from clothes, movie ticket stubs, restaurant tissues, print out of e-tickets and plane tickets that most are already fading, concert tickets, magazines, unused CD's, coins, cutesy stuffs and paper bags to work experience, friends and acquaintance. Name any trash, I have or had it for sure. Not that it is something to be proud of. Some I've learned to let go and some I still hang on to. I remember I even had a pringles can full of bus tickets *that was before ez-link* and a big box of clothing labels from known stores which I've thrown with a heavy heart. Few days after I did that, I've learned that I can move on with my life without those unnecessary things. Still, the "trash-princess" never learned her lesson much. Until now, I do keep things that of no use. And still continue to waste my money and time and effort getting new "trash". I guess I keep them because I felt like I was throwing away the memories that comes with it. This may be the best time to declutter and do some housekeeping. And I'm talking in generality of life. I just hope I'll find the time. Now I'm wondering what could be the best way to throw away stuffs without rethinking of the memorie. If I only have a hard disk installed in me, I would keep them and replayed them in my mind whenever necessary. OR maybe that's the reason why our mind doesn't work that way. Because the only thing we remember are those things that really hit us. Those that made us soooo happy and those that hurts us the most. Whatever purpose one may serve, time will come that we have to let go to make way for the new things in life. I'd say keep those that made us happy. And for those that may have hurt us, keep only the lessons learned. Less is still beautiful.